Parenting arrangements after separation (New Zealand)

New Zealand law talks about day-to-day care and contact, not custody. Most parents record what they agree in a parenting plan, using the Ministry of Justice workbook, and some ask the Family Court to make it a Parenting Order by consent.

If you cannot agree, the path is the Parenting Through Separation course, then Family Dispute Resolution, then the Family Court, in that order.

• A parenting plan is a private agreement; a Parenting Order is made by the Family Court and is enforceable (justice.govt.nz).
• The Parenting Through Separation course is free and usually required before FDR and court.
• The words the court uses are day-to-day care and contact; use them in your plan.

Sources checked September 2026. Government pages change; the links go to the official page for the latest.

• A written parenting plan you both sign is the starting point almost everywhere.
• Courts expect you to try mediation before applying, unless there is family violence.
• Orders are about the child’s best interests, not about which parent is right.
• A clear shared record of handovers and messages makes every later step calmer.

Whatever route you take, a calm shared record helps. ParenThing keeps messages, the calendar, costs and handovers in one private place both parents can see, and your data is held in the EU. See how it works for New Zealand families.